Waco remains satire proof.
While all the rest of the world was getting its drink on, the Waco Tribune-Herald, the Houston Chronicle, the Dallas News, the Fort Worth Star Telegram, the Guardian and very many other news outlets excitedly reported over the weekend that the tyrants who define what justice means in Waco estimate that the Twin Peaks legal fiasco should be finished in only another 4,837 days: God willing and if neither of the two judges who will preside over the trials dies; if nobody else gets indicted; if no more of the 154 men already indicted dies; if in the meantime Waco does not become part of the Islamic Caliphate of Texas; or if, say, most of the remaining defendants don’t just throw in the towel and cop to some lesser charge like wearing a red shirt and a gold belt buckle in Waco, the last case should conclude about April Fools Day 2030.
The real news in all these dozens of accounts is that no one seems to think – one year, seven months and 17 days into the most obvious miscarriage of American justice since Korematsu v. United States – that April 2030 might be kind of a long time for defendants who are self evidently innocent of any actual crime to wait to be tried for something they did not do. It is illustrative of the fatuousness with which this case has been covered by almost everybody that everybody seems not to know that a Cossack named Trey Alston Short, who was indicted for being at the Twin Peaks when all hell broke loose, died last October in a traffic accident while allegedly running from the police on an allegedly stolen motorcycle. The Associated Press, thinks it is close enough to the truth to say that “more than 150 bikers” have been “charged” as a result of “a Central Texas gunfight involving rival motorcycle gangs.”
Look It Up
For the record, 106 men were indicted in November 2015, 48 more were indicted in March 2016 and one guy was indicted in December 2016 – presumably because McLennan County prosecutor Abelino Reyna thinks there is something magical about the number “154” so he needed to indict somebody to take the place of the guy who died two months before.
Somewhere over the rainbow, in the saloon that adjoins that great newsroom in the sky, H. L. Mencken just won another bet. Nothing could better illustrate the concept of cybernetic entropy – which is that comprehension inevitably decays into confusion and then confusion freezes solid – better than the pernicious notion that the Twin Peaks case is about “motorcycle gangs” rather than bureaucratic farce.
Tommy Witherspoon, the poet who covers this case for the Tribune-Herald, reports, “Judge Ralph Strother of Waco’s 19th State District Court will preside over the first trial, set now to begin April 17.” The Waco paper also reports “The first biker to stand trial likely will be Christopher Jacob Carrizal, his father, Christopher Julian Carrizal, or Jerry Edward Pierson, all Bandidos from Dallas.”
Six weeks ago, the Tribune-Herald reported that James Rosas, a member of the Valerosos Motorcycle Club would stand trial on January 23. But that was then.
Do The Math
Witherspoon quotes District Judge Matt Johnson, Reyna’s former law partner as saying, “In complex cases, it’s not uncommon for the trial to occur 18 months to two years after the alleged incident occurred.” What do you think Johnson’s song and dance will be in about 2025?
According to the consensus of published reports Judge Ralph Strother will try the first case in April, Johnson will try the next case in June and then one or the other of the two judges will try about one case a month.
That means the remaining 153 trials will take 12 years and nine months to complete. April Fools 2030. Do the math for yourself if you want.